You’ve probably heard career experts say things like “networking is the only way to get a job these days.” And if you, like most neurodivergent professionals, struggle with these kinds of interactions, this advice can be a real source of anxiety and overwhelm.
It’s a lot – there’s no doubt about that. But the good news is, networking can take a lot of different forms, and if you’re really looking to develop these skills, there are ways you can approach this practice while still respecting your needs as a neurodivergent professional.
Our resident career coach, Veronica Yao, recently teamed up with Ashley Cross from Across Careers to answer questions about networking from a neurodivergent perspective. Read on for the main takeaways! Or watch the full recording posted at the bottom of the page.
Meet the Experts
Veronica Yao (she/her) is a career coach who specializes in supporting neurodivergent professionals in navigating their careers. She is also the owner of Atypical Careers. She says that the workplace is often not designed with neurodivergent individuals in mind, which compounds the daily challenges that her clients face.
Veronica is passionate about helping her clients build sustainable work lives, break free from burnout, and advocate for themselves in their professional environments.
Ashley (she/they) is neurodivergent, nonbinary, and has been coaching clients on job search strategies, resumes, LinkedIn, and interviewing since 2013. They are passionate about helping career changers find meaningful work that aligns with their skills and interests. Learn more: acrosscareers.com.
There’s More Than One Way to Network
“Networking doesn’t have to be going to those giant conferences or events or happy hours.”
– Ashley Cross
When you picture networking, you’re probably thinking of forced small talk, crowded rooms, and having to decode the expectations of a whole bunch of strangers in real time. Add in a dash of rejection sensitivity, and you’ve got a recipe for something truly terrifying.
As Ashley put it, “networking doesn’t have to be going to those giant conferences or events or happy hours. Networking can look a lot of different ways.” If you can’t be your best self in those environments, it defeats the purpose of going in the first place. After all, networking is all about first impressions, and it’s important that you feel relatively comfortable and supported in order to present yourself well.
Consider smaller, more intimate networking events with people who are aligned with where you want to take your career. Or take your networking online through virtual communities like Linkedin or Alignable. Each of these settings will offer pros and cons, so consider what kind of environment would give you the best chance at success.
Consider your preferred communication style when deciding where you want to focus your networking efforts. “[Do you perform better] in person, where you’re talking in the moment and coming up with answers,” says Veronica. “Or maybe online networking is better for you because you can sit and think about your answer.”
Be Intentional: Networking with Purpose
“The more clear you are on your direction and what your goals are, the easier it will be for your connection to share your vision.”
– Veronica Yao
It’s hard to make a good impression if you’re not sure what kind of impression you’re trying to make! There isn’t one standard approach to networking – every connection will have different dynamics at play.
For example, if you aren’t sure what field of work you want to get into, then you won’t know which individuals you should initiate a conversation with. It’s important to narrow down in advance what kind of job you are looking for so you can position yourself as a strong candidate and connection for others who share your vocation.
Also, you should have an objective when making a new connection. Are you looking for career advice? Potential job openings? Or perhaps you’re looking to meet others in your field of work. “The more clear you are on your direction and what your goals are, the easier it will be for your connection to share your vision,” says Veronica.
An intentional approach will also help you make the most of your energy, as we’ll explore in the next section.
Using Your Energy Wisely
“Networking should fit into your life, not the other way around.”
– Ashley Cross
For neurodivergent individuals, energy management is crucial. “We have limited amounts of energy and we need to ration it,” says Veronica.
When it comes to in person networking, don’t feel pressured to attend every event or stay longer than you’re comfortable with. Make the most of your short time there, and consider planning breaks and identifying “safe zones” in the area where you can rest and recover a bit.
If you’re not finding networking opportunities that suit your needs, Ashley suggests organizing your own event so you can meet the kinds of people you want to meet on your own terms. “Networking should fit into your life, not the other way around,” says Ashley.
As neurodivergent individuals, we know that energy management is crucial. Veronica wisely reminds us, “We have limited amounts of energy we need to ration it.” Don’t feel pressured to attend every networking event or stay longer than you’re comfortable with. Veronica suggests planning breaks during events and focusing on small groups or one-on-one conversations.
Challenging the Idea of “Professionalism”
“You get to decide what “professional” looks like.”
– Ashley Cross
Professionalism isn’t a standard set of rules to follow – it’s more about meeting the expectations of the person that you’re interacting with. In other work, professionalism will look different depending on the context.
“How you interact with a coworker will differ from how you interact with a manager,” explains Veronica. Each connection will have their own expectations for what constitutes a successful interaction. So it’s important that you set your own standards as well.
“You get to decide what “professional” looks like,” says Ashley. “And chances are, everyone is paying more attention to themselves.”
Watch the recording of the full Q&A below!